My Wife and I tied the knot on June 18, 2011. Even after six months it’s amazing that a husband can remember the day he married the best person in the world. I say, “person” because I respect hetero and homosexual relationships, even though I prefer women, of course.
I met my wife during a minority journalism workshop in high school as we both desired to be journalist. She sat next to me and at that moment I knew I was going to have a friend that year.
I analyze everyone at all times...well...when I am paying attention but I paid attention to her all day.
While we waited to get our instructions I noticed she had on one glove. I looked around to see if she had misplaced it around our desks so that I can retrieve it, being the gentleman I trained myself to be.
When I could not find it, this single and lonely glove confused me. I needed to crack this case and so I began the most important interview of my life.
I said, ”Why do you have on one glove.” She acted as if it was normal and looked down trying to recognize what I thought was a problem. She replied, “Because one hand is cold.”
While I processed and asked my question as a mystery, she answered the question as if it were a math question. You know, one multiplied by one equals a satisfied hand.
Whatever the equation was, the solution was to marry this girl.
I have been with her for seven years and it has been the best seven years of my life. Trust me, I have gone through life’s issues but it has been the best experiences because she was there for me. Although religious folk will not agree with us we have co-habitated years before marriage. I do believe in God and Jesus Christ but no church claims me. I have my reasons.
Since I we been living together I noticed that she does things that annoy me. I love her enough not to embarrass her so I will make up something. Something that would annoy me would be to leave a wet towel on the floor. If I came home and walked into the bathroom and noticed it I would either hang it up or throw it in the hamper.
Things like wet towels shouldn’t make or break a relationship so I tend to not worry. If becomes a problem then I would sit down and talk with her about it instead of yelling or waiting for an argument to lash out. Because I love her I don’t do that.
My wife has been my everything for the last eight years of our relationship and my love is no what Edward and Bella have on TV. Bella never had to pay personal property tax while vampire Edward has to work two jobs to pay the bills. Also, I never seen a guy yelling in the streets claiming his complicated (I’m going to make a fool of myself because this is the end of the movie but start to a happy ending) love for a girl where the whole street and sidewalk applauds and does a Slumdog Millionaire Bollywood dance number about love.
This is the real world folks, this is what I call love:
Love doesn’t pay the bills nor does it solve issues like finding a job, family issues or self-esteem issues. When my brother married his wife during his senior year and no one particular was on his side he said, “That’s OK. Because we got love!” Love is a good chunk of a marriage and but there are logistics that people do not consider.
When you take responsibility for someone’s life you have to treat it like a business. You and your spouse are CEOs of your marriage. You consider the risks, collateral, expansion (babies), and opportunity but there is one thing you never want to do is find a merger. You never want someone else trying to get into your marriage. Everyone will try and push their way in but you never let them in. Mothers, fathers, siblings, friends and co-workers can come and visit but they can never be a shareholder. And if all else fails you tell them, “Mind your own business.”
Maybe this is a monologue, but it is coming to an end. I was never a guy for strip clubs or stag parties. I really don’t believe a woman looks good being easy or dressing slutty for anything. I prefer women of success or a woman with a dream to succeed. I don’t believe a woman should OBEY but to reach a compromise to any relationship. I believe the best thing a man can do is earn a woman’s respect and trust without financial or physical force. I understand that there are men whom acted a certain way, but some things need to change for the sake of our existence.
Because I am not the average male or “wuss” or any sort, I believe I was born to be a good husband. At the end of the day, I want to be at home with my wife on the couch and holding a good conversation with kisses in between.
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