I was watching netflix and came across Ralphie May, a comedian, performing his stand-up special. He started a bit about making love to his pregnant wife with his unborn son being apart of the action. Well, not intentionally. He looked down at her stomach and seen the baby do the "Mummy sandstorm routine." That's when the baby runs his face across the belly and open his mouth like a monster trying to get out. This maybe the wost intro ever, but this is about the first time I felt the baby kick.
Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with sex. You weirdos. You know who you are.
He's my kung fu baby. That is the only way I can describe it. For the last two weeks my wife has been preaching about Robert Jr. moving inside and I never get any proof. I would lay my hand on her belly and he automatically turns into NINJA BABY! He hides in the shadows of the womb without a trace.
Baby Vanish!
He returns when I am at my weakest state. Bedtime. My wife tells me he like to move around and kick around midnight, which is her usual sleeping time. He has kept her up in recent nights but I have plans to put him to rest.
One evening on the couch my wife, suddenly, grabs my hands to her stomach.
Baby vs. Daddy
I place my hand on her stomach and baby lands as right kick to my hand. He kicked so hard I saw one foot and five toes!
Baby Wins! Flawless Victory.
I have seen it in movies and heard stories but nothing comes close to feeling your first baby's kick. It was amazing to verify that my wife wasn't crazy and feel the little guy move around. Also, I know that this is only the beginning and there will be more kicking involved. I feel like after a few weeks he will master womb-kwan-do and we will spar again.
I have won two battles so far. He began to move one night and I put my face towards my wife's belly with two hand in a deep voice.
"HEY, GO TO SLEEP!!!"
No more moving for the rest of the night. I guess Future Daddy's still got it.
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